I want to tell you about a time that I smashed my phone, willingly.
One morning, years ago, I dropped my then 3-yo off at preschool, and he was throwing (yet another) fit. My cheeks burned with embarrassment at his outburst in front of his teachers. He was sobbing, dragging his feet, flailing his little arms, and basically trying everything possible to not make me take him into the classroom. I felt helpless, and was so angry that his temper tantrum was making me late for work (again).
I was frustrated at myself too; because this time I didn’t have a shred of grace for him in the moment. This was not the first time this had happened. Rather, this was the norm.
I felt overwhelmed and upset as I pulled out of the school parking lot. I faced a 45-minute drive in morning rush-hour traffic to get to my office in downtown SA and I was an emotional wreck.
So as I drove down the access road, I took the only object near me, my phone, and smashed it against the steering wheel. I screamed. Tears streamed down my face. I turned my phone over to see that the screen looked like a tangled spider web of white crystals spread out from the center.
I didn’t think the damage would be so bad given I had a screen protector on it! But let’s just say, I was lucky it was still working at that point. I also knew we didn’t have the money to cover the cost of a new phone, and this was a time before all the U-Break-I-Fix shops began to pop up.
All of this: the broken phone, the sting in my throat, and the ruined mascara, led to overwhelming sense that my life felt out of control – because honestly, I was un-balanced in my life as a whole.
I’m sharing this story with you today because maybe you’ve been there before. Okay, maybe YOU haven’t smashed your own phone out of anger, but perhaps you felt like it.
You know what it is for you. Feeling desperate. Longing for something different. Wanting to spend more time with the ones you love, and less time in traffic.
Friend, you’re not alone.
At that time in my life, I was working crazy hours, spending way too much time in the car commuting, and bringing work home with me in the evenings. Truth be told, when I look back, I don’t have many solid memories of my first two sons when they were that little. Much of it is a blur. And that makes me sad.
So what is “life balance?” Let’s first talk about what it’s not.
It’s not: Doing everything for an equal amount of time.
As working women, wives, and moms, we juggle many different roles and we tend to think that we should play each of those roles equally, all the time, in order to “achieve” life balance.
I don’t know about you, but that sounds exhausting! Also – “achieving” life balance makes it sound like once you’ve conquered it, you never have to worry about it again. When we know that isn’t the truth. The seasons in our lives change often, and therefore we must find a new balance.
So when I became an entrepreneur in 2017, I wanted something different. I wanted to create time freedom for me and my family. That’s what mattered to me. Those desires were later confirmed when I attended a women’s business conference and I heard Christy Wright speak on life balance. She said:
Life balance is about doing the right things at the right time.– Christy Wright
That changed my whole perspective! And I believe it to be true – down to my core. I believe this is critical to transforming how you view your season of life.
I believe asking yourself this ONE question is vital to two main points:
- Answering how you can give yourself grace on the hard days
- Answering how you want to show up for yourself and others
It’s mid January now. Maybe you’re freaking out that you don’t have your goals for this year figured out yet. And somehow you feel “behind.” I want to remind you that it’s okay to not have it all “figured out” right now.
That’s why you can give yourself grace – knowing that it’s okay to not get it all done right now, or have it all worked out.
So grab your favorite hot beverage on this cold January day, and ask yourself, “What’s right for me, right now?”
Want to dig into this topic on a deeper level? I want to invite you to join my 4-week course Get Back to Goals: How to 10x your momentum, get rid of guilt, & get your life back with goals that matter to you!
Let’s make this year your best year yet by gaining a new perspective and truly discover life balance that is, well-balanced!